First Bath & First Smiles

Avery's cord stump didn't fall off until he was about four weeks old, so he was almost a full month old before he had his first real bath. He loved it, just like his brother always did!

He also started smiling around four weeks! I am pretty sure Ari didn't smile before the six week mark. We didn't manage to get tons of shots of the smile that early, but here are a couple... it was definitely there when he interacted with us. Now he smiles as soon as he sees me or his dad after he wakes up, and he smiles at me during and after nursing. :)

Avery one month

Well our newest addition has made it a month already. Pretty soon we'll be writing one of these about how he is now two. But let's not get ahead of ourselves. So far Avery seems to be a little more chill than his brother was, we can actually set him down on occasion and he will take a nap by himself. We are still working on the night time schedule, so far it has been pretty irregular, hopefully we will start to develop a bit of a pattern soon. Avery also seems to like his car seat, he usually only fusses when getting strapped in or if he has pooped. I would fuss about that myself I have to say. We had our one month check up and he came in at 10lbs 9ozs and 22.5", not to mention happy and healthy. We are all fighting off some minor colds at the moment, it's hard to keep Ari from loving on his brother when he adores him so much. We are looking forward to warmer weather and seeing our newest addition learn about the world.

Thanks to Aunt Renee for taking a couple of pictures for us with her camera and special lens.

My Second (and last) Birth Story

50+ Hour Labor, Repeat C-section Birth

I went into labor Monday morning the 13th; contractions started around 5am. They steadily got closer together all day long. Around 10pm something switched and they got much, much more intense and were consistently 3 minutes apart. My doula came over. She checked me and I was 2cm and 80-85% effaced. The weekend before I had been 1cm. Anne Marie (midwife/naturopath) showed up around 2am. Around 3am we filled the birth tub. I stayed in there for a couple hours. Contractions were even more intense by now, still 3 minutes apart. I was handling them well though, especially in the tub; I was breathing and was so proud of how I was working with my body. So excited to be having my home birth. Around 5:30am I was checked - 24 hours into labor, 7 hours into the intense, 3-min apart ctx - and no progress. Still only 2cm. I cried. I didn't get back in the tub; I tried to rest on the bed but there was no way I could sleep with these contractions. I took some homeopathics to try to help things progress. Anne Marie said we should check again at 9:30 and consider going to the hospital if there was no progress. She was worried about exhaustion. My doula left to go teach a class that morning.

At 9:30am on Tuesday I was still 2cm dilated and 80% effaced. Anne Marie gave us the option of continuing but again said she was concerned about exhaustion and not being able to push baby out if progress was this slow, but still intense enough that I could not sleep. She said there might be something hindering the process that we could not determine, like a short cord. We went to the hospital.

Triage took forever. I was still 2cm by 3pm that day, 34ish hours into labor. After talking with the doctor there we decided to check in, hoping that I could get an epidural that would allow me to rest and hopefully continue dilating. If after having the epidural for several hours, I still didn't make progress, we would try pitocin. All the shit I wanted to avoid. But I didn't know what else to do. I still don't understand why I was not dilating after being in what felt like active labor for so long.

The epidural was administered around 4pm. It kind of worked initially but more on one side, and I tried to sleep, but a dozen people interrupted everything and I maybe got 20 minutes. Then it started to wear off and I especially could feel everything on my right side. Impossible to sleep again. They tried a couple different things to get it working again but no luck. At 7pm Anne Marie had to leave to attend another birth. Around 8pm (almost 40 hours of labor and no sleep) I was still 2cm and they started the lowest possible dose of pitocin. The epidural wore off entirely and I was in pain, and stuck in the bed because being a VBAC they required constant fetal monitoring. They administered a 2nd epidural. Again it worked more on one side than the other (opposite side), but it was enough to get some rest. This is when I got my only two hours of sleep (still interrupted by several people) in my 2.5 days of labor. Then the epidural started to wear off again in the early morning. They tried a stronger dose and other things but nothing worked and eventually it wore off entirely. This was early Wednesday morning. The pitocin was working but still slowly; I was 4cm. Contractions were 2min apart and very painful. My doula showed up again sometime that morning. I finally consented to them breaking my waters. The contractions intensified.

Around 9:30am (about 53 hours of labor) I was still 4cm. I was up on all fours feeling so much pressure and pain, moaning and growling through contractions. The nurse just kept obsessing over the fetal monitor not being in place because I was moving around. (His heart rate had been perfect thus far.) I requested a c-section. I simply did not believe I had the energy to do it; I figured it would still be several more hours of dilating and then pushing. I signed the consent form. The doctor checked me at 10am and to everyone's amazement I was 7cm. I had dilated 3cm in 30 minutes. I was hitting transition; I threw up. I agreed to get checked again before the surgery. I decided if I kept progressing that fast and was a 9 or 10 very soon, I would try to push him out. My body was already pushing him down. But at 10:30am I was still at 7cm and I could not fathom continuing for hours more. He was born via repeat c-section at 11am. 9/9 apgars, 9lb, 22in. His head was already in the birth canal and he was so big, the doctor had to extend her initial incision in order to wrestle him out.

Of course it was disappointing to not have a home birth after all of the planning and preparation (and money) that we put into it, but it was even more disappointing not to have a vaginal birth. It has been really difficult for me to deal with emotionally, especially knowing I eventually made it to 7cm... and of course the physical recovery from a c-section sucks too.

First photo with Avery with mom and dad.

First time nursing, about an hour after delivery - he latched right on.

Brothers meeting for the first time.

Other Reflections on the Experience

This birth, despite being a c-section, was still much more positive than my first.


For the following reasons:

* I went into labor on my own, so baby was ready to come out. So incredibly important, seriously.
* I got to labor for over 24 hours at home. I really enjoyed many of these hours even if I was disappointed to transfer at the end of them. I enjoyed being with Sean, in my own home; I enjoyed the birth tub.
* Once at the hospital I was honestly impressed with the staff. 9 of 10 people we interacted with ranged from nice/good to amazing/above and beyond. Such a difference from the last hospital, and also a relief because I was worried about being treated poorly as a homebirth transfer. The first nurse I was assigned in L&D was actually a certified doula as well - the only RN in AZ who is also a doula. Cool. There were exceptions, a couple dumb doctors/residents and a cranky tech, but overall everyone was wonderful.
* They all read my birth plan - each shift - and discussed it with me, asked questions, let me know about forms we would need to sign for things we were declining, all in a respectful manner.
* Once it was time to augment labor with pitocin, they followed my wishes (and best practice for a VBAC) on doing so very slowly. They upped the dose more slowly than usual and by the time I had the baby it had only gone up to a 10 when they regular use levels around 20. This was best both for the baby and for my scarred uterus.
* Although they offered to break my bag of waters several times throughout the process, they didn't pressure or hassle me when I said no. I only consented after I had gotten to 4cm and been in labor for 48 hours; before then I had not wanted to be on "the clock" plus I was being cautious because I was GBS +. (But by 48 hours I knew I was kidding myself and I was already on a clock, I couldn't do this for two more days. :P)
* The resident assigned to me was very encouraging about the VBAC. I think she was disappointed when I asked for a RCS. :P She wanted to see me accomplish my goal. This was nice given I was just assigned a random doctor.
* I got to hold my baby and nurse him in just under an hour after surgery. He latched right on. (I didn't get to hold Ari for five hours.) I feel like bonding has happened immediately with Avery whereas it took awhile with Ari. I am so grateful for this.


Overall, a much better, much less traumatic experience in many ways. This is what I am trying to focus on... that I did the best I could to achieve my goal and even though I didn't get a home birth or a vaginal birth, this surgical birth experience was still worlds better than my first. It is hard not to feel "broken" after two surgical births though and we definitely won't be having any more kids. But in the end I am ok and I got two healthy boys from these experiences.

Avery Blaine

Let me start by saying that neither of our kids made there way into the world in the easiest of fashions for Mom and Dad, but despite all that and some major disappointment along the way the important thing is that we have two beautiful healthy boys!! I will let Cara post the birth story in this forum if she chooses, as it is quite a tale.

I think a week is long enough to wait to meet your adoring fans! So without further adieu, please give it up for Avery Blaine Laird!! Born 02/15/2012 weighing in at an even 9lbs and a whopping 22" in length. BTW that about the 85 and 105 percentile respectively. Other than having to spend an extra day in the hospital for some photo therapy because of a blood compatibility issue with Cara which made him more jaundice, Avery has been doing great. He is nursing like a champ and charming the socks off of everyone he meets.


I told you he was a big boy!Ari meeting and holding his new brother for the first time in the hospital. I have to say that I'm very proud of Ari for the way he dealt with the situation of his brother being born. He spent the night with Nana Mary on two different occasions having never spent the night away from Mom and Dad before, without nary a fuss. Way to go little man!!

I think he's in love! Who wouldn't be?
Here he is a week old and check out all that hair.
How could anyone not want to just nibble on these little pig toes?
Photo shoot time! We wanted to take some pictures of Avery for a birth announcement and he was happy to oblige us with some natural photogenics. These were a couple of our favorites and are like contenders for his announcement.

Christmas!

So this year's Christmas was especially cool for us. Ari was very excited for Santa to come this year so that we could open all the presents under the Christmas tree. Cara and I were just as excited to see him so excited. It was all I could do to keep the two of them from opening presents a couple of weeks before Christmas. Although I did give Cara her big Christmas present early so that she could use it. I got her a six month membership to Massage Envy so she could get some prenatal massages. So far I haven't heard any complaints. We decided to open all of our presents Christmas Eve morning because we go to Nana Mary's house Christmas morning with all the cousins. Plus it's not like Ari knows what day it is so two days of presents is better than one! We also spent Christmas Eve evening at the Laird extended family Christmas. Ari was the life of the party being that he was the last munchkin there as all the others went to other family gatherings. Then we spent this morning with Nana Alexis as she brought over her presents for us. All in all the weekend went pretty smoothly sans one nap for Ari which led to a not so smooth evening. But enough talking lets get to the good stuff.

Santa was listening this year. This has been the big hit of the Christmas presents! He hasn't wanted to leave it's side! I'm not sure about this Santa guy stealing the thunder of the best present.

Opening one of his presents from Uncle Jon and Aunt Laura. He loved the car transporter!

Rocket ship from Mom and Dad!

The Kitchen with additional appliances and pots and pans courtesy of Santa, Aunt Metri and Aunt Jamie!

The closest contender so far to the kitchen, Nana Alexis hooked him up with Legos galore!

We neglected to take our camera to Christmas morning with all of his cousins. We knew we were forgetting something. My sister Renee had her camera rolling so I know she'll send us some pictures to post. We'll see how long it takes her to read the blog and know that we need some.

Baby Boy #2 Update

I am a little over 30 weeks now and we had a prenatal appointment today. All is good and healthy with mama and baby! He is head down (he was at the last appointment too, so hopefully he just stays put). His heart rate was good. I am measuring a bit ahead belly wise at 32cm, but my midwife isn't concerned. I didn't do the traditional one hour glucose test but she did draw blood at the last appointment for a couple of tests and included a glucose screen, and all of my blood work is normal - normal sugar levels, iron levels, etc.

At 30 weeks in my first pregnancy, I had been swollen for weeks and my blood pressure started reading high and I was put on home bed rest. No swelling this time around, and my b/p today was 120/58. :) I have gained a lot more weight this pregnancy - about 30lbs so far - I only gained about 23-24 total with Ari (by 36 weeks when he was born). Again since I'm all around healthy in every other respect, it's not a concern (well, not a medical concern, but I hate the scale anyway :P). I attribute it to the fact that I actually have an appetite this time and have also been striving for the protein recommendation my midwife gave me of 70g a day - that's quite a bit of food.

We got some more info about preparing for the home birth and will get even more details in another month or so when she does a home visit. I hired a doula last week - she happens to be a ND (naturopath) who did homebirths in Tucson for 20 years. She doesn't deliver babies anymore but she does work as a doula in addition to working part time at a naturopathic clinic in town. What's cool is that unlike a typical doula, she can do cervical checks and listen to the baby's heart rate. She will be able to tell us when I am in active labor and making progress so that my midwife doesn't make an unnecessary trip for a false alarm. ;) So I will be trying to schedule a time next month when both the midwife and doula can visit on the same day so they can meet each other.

Anyway, we are excited and happy to that everything is still going swimmingly with the pregnancy. I know the next 10 weeks are going to fly by!

Rocket ships!

I have decided to redecorate Ari's room in a rocket ship theme (also keeping in mind it will be shared with his baby brother eventually). He likes rocket ships thanks to Curious George and Little Einsteins, and I think it's just a cute theme. I haven't bought much yet but I have found a good list of potential stuff in the right colors - blue, yellow, and orange, we're keeping the same paint colors we already have in there.

Awhile ago, a mama friend of mine in IL offered to make baby boy a quilt if I sent her fabric that I like. Couldn't refuse that offer! She sent it to me this week and it is *adorable*. The patterned fabric has rocket ships, planets, and robots, and she stitched a big rocket ship across the middle of the quilt and stars all around the edges. So cute and all the more special to have something for the baby handmade by a friend.

Then at our recent trip to the mall to see Santa, Ari wanted to go "in a store." So we walked into Ross and lo and behold, found him a rocket ship comforter/sham set! It was only $18 after tax, I was so thrilled. Target has a rocket ship theme bedroom set but it is much pricier. Ari still doesn't sleep with a blanket over him, but I figure he will eventually and last night he was thrilled to sleep on top of the comforter, haha. And it does the job to fill in the gaps between his mattress and his bed frame which were previously stuffed with random blankets. This is a phone pic but you get the idea... this rocket ship room is coming together!:

Santa!

We decided to take Ari to the mall this year to see Santa for the first time. We have been reading The Night Before Christmas, The Polar Express, etc. and he was very excited to see Santa. We even printed his Christmas list which included photos of what he wanted so he could have a reminder of what to tell Santa.

We went on a Thursday afternoon, because we are smart like that. No line at all. But once we got there, he had zero interest in talking to Santa. I think partly he got shy, but partly it was because Santa was hanging out next to the mall play area so Ari wanted to play. We let him play for a bit then I talked him into seeing Santa if mom would walk up there with him. So I sat right next to them and he did fabulously. He said hi, told Santa everything on his list, and even sat for a photo with him although we weren't quick enough to catch his smile. (We didn't pay the $10 for them to take the photo since they let us take two for free. Especially because you pay beforehand, and I didn't even know if he would sit with Santa or throw a fit or what!) He was very excited after it was all over and very proud of himself. :)

Afterward with his free reindeer hat:

Prenatal Appointment & Change of Plans!

I had my most recent prenatal appointment on the 19th at just over 27 weeks. I think everyone has heard about the results of this appointment, but I figured I would document it in detail for the sake of keeping up with blogging and looking back on this exciting time later down the road. ;)

Before my midwife Claudine even started the exam, she said she had something to talk to us about. This birth center is fairly new, only opened in February of this year. She has her state accreditation but has been working on getting a national accreditation since August. The national certificate is not required, it just looks better for the birth center and also enables more insurance companies to contract with the center. However Claudine was just informed - despite having several VBAC patients on record since the summer, like me - that the center won't be approved if she serves VBAC patients there. This is silly for a number of reasons, including the fact that *after* she is certified she could apply and be approved for an exception to the rule, based on their most recent guidelines (http://www.birthcenteraccreditation.org/2011/07/cabc-vbac-policy-adopted-june-2008/). But she has to get the certificate first, and then apply for exception, and this process won't be complete until after our baby is due.

So she said we have several options. I can transfer care; she can hide my file and essentially lie and still let me birth at the center; OR, she can simply attend my birth at my home. She does attend home births and as a CNM is legally able to attend a VBAC at home. Previously she did not wish to go so far to attend a birth, but she would rather do this than drop me as a patient or fudge her paperwork.

When I first became pregnant with this baby - even before - I looked into the home birth option. The more educated I became about my different options and best chance for a successful VBAC, the more I wanted a home birth. The problem was finding a provider; there are only three CNMs in Arizona who do home births (most CNMs work in hospitals, while LMs - licensed midwives - attend home births, but cannot legally attend VBACs). Out of the three CNMs, one is in Tucson but chooses not to do VBACs. The other two are in Phoenix; I contacted one and her schedule was full. So I contacted Claudine. She is running a birth center as well as doing home births in the Phoenix area, so she did not wish to commit to a home birth out of town. But she was also running the only birth center in the state that would accept VBACs, so we chose that as our next best option as it seemed we just couldn't make a home birth happen.

So needless to say when she offered to attend our birth at home, Sean and I jumped at the option. (Sean, incidentally, is almost more adamant than I am about staying out of the hospital for this birth!) I know it is less convenient for her, but I am so grateful she offered to do this rather than just telling us we had to transfer care, as she could have done.

I've already done all of my "homework" she requested: I verified that our insurance will cover the home birth, I collected the pertinent phone numbers for the hospital we will use in the event of an emergency transfer, and I spoke with the fire department about response times and helicopter availability just in case. (This is all "just in case" really, she wants us to be prepared for the worst although none of us have any reason to anticipate anything going wrong.) Most women who end up transferring their home birth to a hospital do so by choice, rather than it being a true emergency. The reality is, pregnancy and birth are not nearly as dangerous as tales of western medicine can make them out to be! ;)

So, that was long winded. And we are having a home birth, possibly a home water birth as we will rent a birthing tub in case I want to use it. We are thrilled to say the least - after wanting a home birth from the beginning I had given up on the idea. But I still felt cranky and grumbled about it every time we had to make the hour and a half drive. ;) Speaking of, this also puts my mind at ease as far as logistics of the birth center being an hour and a half away and how to handle that while in labor, finding child care for Ari possible in the middle of the night, etc.

Oh, and the actual exam went fine! Mama and baby are healthy. Baby was head down, we'll see if he stays put or flips a few more times, and his heart rate was good. :)

Halloween

We realized we never did a Halloween post so I am back dating this and sliding it in. ;)

A couple days before Halloween we carved pumpkins. Or, I carved pumpkins while Ari watched. He wanted very little to do with scooping seeds out or the general messiness.

On Halloween we took him trick or treating for the first time. He did so well, I wasn't sure if he would really participate since it involved talking to strangers, but he said "trick or treat" and "thank you" at every house! He was a monkey aka Curious George and Sean was the Man in the Yellow Hat. :) He had a really good time and wanted to go trick or treating again the next night. We let him have one piece of candy after dinner for about three nights afterwards then he pretty much forgot about it and the candy, uh, mysteriously disappeared.

Proud of his pumpkins.

Mad because he wanted to GO trick or treating already, not pose for pictures!