Thanks to Aunt Renee for taking a couple of pictures for us with her camera and special lens.
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Avery one month
Well our newest addition has made it a month already. Pretty soon we'll be writing one of these about how he is now two. But let's not get ahead of ourselves. So far Avery seems to be a little more chill than his brother was, we can actually set him down on occasion and he will take a nap by himself. We are still working on the night time schedule, so far it has been pretty irregular, hopefully we will start to develop a bit of a pattern soon. Avery also seems to like his car seat, he usually only fusses when getting strapped in or if he has pooped. I would fuss about that myself I have to say. We had our one month check up and he came in at 10lbs 9ozs and 22.5", not to mention happy and healthy. We are all fighting off some minor colds at the moment, it's hard to keep Ari from loving on his brother when he adores him so much. We are looking forward to warmer weather and seeing our newest addition learn about the world.
Thanks to Aunt Renee for taking a couple of pictures for us with her camera and special lens.
Thanks to Aunt Renee for taking a couple of pictures for us with her camera and special lens.
Friday, March 2, 2012
My Second (and last) Birth Story
50+ Hour Labor, Repeat C-section Birth
I went into labor Monday morning the 13th; contractions started around 5am. They steadily got closer together all day long. Around 10pm something switched and they got much, much more intense and were consistently 3 minutes apart. My doula came over. She checked me and I was 2cm and 80-85% effaced. The weekend before I had been 1cm. Anne Marie (midwife/naturopath) showed up around 2am. Around 3am we filled the birth tub. I stayed in there for a couple hours. Contractions were even more intense by now, still 3 minutes apart. I was handling them well though, especially in the tub; I was breathing and was so proud of how I was working with my body. So excited to be having my home birth. Around 5:30am I was checked - 24 hours into labor, 7 hours into the intense, 3-min apart ctx - and no progress. Still only 2cm. I cried. I didn't get back in the tub; I tried to rest on the bed but there was no way I could sleep with these contractions. I took some homeopathics to try to help things progress. Anne Marie said we should check again at 9:30 and consider going to the hospital if there was no progress. She was worried about exhaustion. My doula left to go teach a class that morning.
At 9:30am on Tuesday I was still 2cm dilated and 80% effaced. Anne Marie gave us the option of continuing but again said she was concerned about exhaustion and not being able to push baby out if progress was this slow, but still intense enough that I could not sleep. She said there might be something hindering the process that we could not determine, like a short cord. We went to the hospital.
Triage took forever. I was still 2cm by 3pm that day, 34ish hours into labor. After talking with the doctor there we decided to check in, hoping that I could get an epidural that would allow me to rest and hopefully continue dilating. If after having the epidural for several hours, I still didn't make progress, we would try pitocin. All the shit I wanted to avoid. But I didn't know what else to do. I still don't understand why I was not dilating after being in what felt like active labor for so long.
The epidural was administered around 4pm. It kind of worked initially but more on one side, and I tried to sleep, but a dozen people interrupted everything and I maybe got 20 minutes. Then it started to wear off and I especially could feel everything on my right side. Impossible to sleep again. They tried a couple different things to get it working again but no luck. At 7pm Anne Marie had to leave to attend another birth. Around 8pm (almost 40 hours of labor and no sleep) I was still 2cm and they started the lowest possible dose of pitocin. The epidural wore off entirely and I was in pain, and stuck in the bed because being a VBAC they required constant fetal monitoring. They administered a 2nd epidural. Again it worked more on one side than the other (opposite side), but it was enough to get some rest. This is when I got my only two hours of sleep (still interrupted by several people) in my 2.5 days of labor. Then the epidural started to wear off again in the early morning. They tried a stronger dose and other things but nothing worked and eventually it wore off entirely. This was early Wednesday morning. The pitocin was working but still slowly; I was 4cm. Contractions were 2min apart and very painful. My doula showed up again sometime that morning. I finally consented to them breaking my waters. The contractions intensified.
Around 9:30am (about 53 hours of labor) I was still 4cm. I was up on all fours feeling so much pressure and pain, moaning and growling through contractions. The nurse just kept obsessing over the fetal monitor not being in place because I was moving around. (His heart rate had been perfect thus far.) I requested a c-section. I simply did not believe I had the energy to do it; I figured it would still be several more hours of dilating and then pushing. I signed the consent form. The doctor checked me at 10am and to everyone's amazement I was 7cm. I had dilated 3cm in 30 minutes. I was hitting transition; I threw up. I agreed to get checked again before the surgery. I decided if I kept progressing that fast and was a 9 or 10 very soon, I would try to push him out. My body was already pushing him down. But at 10:30am I was still at 7cm and I could not fathom continuing for hours more. He was born via repeat c-section at 11am. 9/9 apgars, 9lb, 22in. His head was already in the birth canal and he was so big, the doctor had to extend her initial incision in order to wrestle him out.
Of course it was disappointing to not have a home birth after all of the planning and preparation (and money) that we put into it, but it was even more disappointing not to have a vaginal birth. It has been really difficult for me to deal with emotionally, especially knowing I eventually made it to 7cm... and of course the physical recovery from a c-section sucks too.
First photo with Avery with mom and dad.
First time nursing, about an hour after delivery - he latched right on.
Brothers meeting for the first time.
Other Reflections on the Experience
This birth, despite being a c-section, was still much more positive than my first.
For the following reasons:
* I went into labor on my own, so baby was ready to come out. So incredibly important, seriously.
* I got to labor for over 24 hours at home. I really enjoyed many of these hours even if I was disappointed to transfer at the end of them. I enjoyed being with Sean, in my own home; I enjoyed the birth tub.
* Once at the hospital I was honestly impressed with the staff. 9 of 10 people we interacted with ranged from nice/good to amazing/above and beyond. Such a difference from the last hospital, and also a relief because I was worried about being treated poorly as a homebirth transfer. The first nurse I was assigned in L&D was actually a certified doula as well - the only RN in AZ who is also a doula. Cool. There were exceptions, a couple dumb doctors/residents and a cranky tech, but overall everyone was wonderful.
* They all read my birth plan - each shift - and discussed it with me, asked questions, let me know about forms we would need to sign for things we were declining, all in a respectful manner.
* Once it was time to augment labor with pitocin, they followed my wishes (and best practice for a VBAC) on doing so very slowly. They upped the dose more slowly than usual and by the time I had the baby it had only gone up to a 10 when they regular use levels around 20. This was best both for the baby and for my scarred uterus.
* Although they offered to break my bag of waters several times throughout the process, they didn't pressure or hassle me when I said no. I only consented after I had gotten to 4cm and been in labor for 48 hours; before then I had not wanted to be on "the clock" plus I was being cautious because I was GBS +. (But by 48 hours I knew I was kidding myself and I was already on a clock, I couldn't do this for two more days. :P)
* The resident assigned to me was very encouraging about the VBAC. I think she was disappointed when I asked for a RCS. :P She wanted to see me accomplish my goal. This was nice given I was just assigned a random doctor.
* I got to hold my baby and nurse him in just under an hour after surgery. He latched right on. (I didn't get to hold Ari for five hours.) I feel like bonding has happened immediately with Avery whereas it took awhile with Ari. I am so grateful for this.
Overall, a much better, much less traumatic experience in many ways. This is what I am trying to focus on... that I did the best I could to achieve my goal and even though I didn't get a home birth or a vaginal birth, this surgical birth experience was still worlds better than my first. It is hard not to feel "broken" after two surgical births though and we definitely won't be having any more kids. But in the end I am ok and I got two healthy boys from these experiences.
I went into labor Monday morning the 13th; contractions started around 5am. They steadily got closer together all day long. Around 10pm something switched and they got much, much more intense and were consistently 3 minutes apart. My doula came over. She checked me and I was 2cm and 80-85% effaced. The weekend before I had been 1cm. Anne Marie (midwife/naturopath) showed up around 2am. Around 3am we filled the birth tub. I stayed in there for a couple hours. Contractions were even more intense by now, still 3 minutes apart. I was handling them well though, especially in the tub; I was breathing and was so proud of how I was working with my body. So excited to be having my home birth. Around 5:30am I was checked - 24 hours into labor, 7 hours into the intense, 3-min apart ctx - and no progress. Still only 2cm. I cried. I didn't get back in the tub; I tried to rest on the bed but there was no way I could sleep with these contractions. I took some homeopathics to try to help things progress. Anne Marie said we should check again at 9:30 and consider going to the hospital if there was no progress. She was worried about exhaustion. My doula left to go teach a class that morning.
At 9:30am on Tuesday I was still 2cm dilated and 80% effaced. Anne Marie gave us the option of continuing but again said she was concerned about exhaustion and not being able to push baby out if progress was this slow, but still intense enough that I could not sleep. She said there might be something hindering the process that we could not determine, like a short cord. We went to the hospital.
Triage took forever. I was still 2cm by 3pm that day, 34ish hours into labor. After talking with the doctor there we decided to check in, hoping that I could get an epidural that would allow me to rest and hopefully continue dilating. If after having the epidural for several hours, I still didn't make progress, we would try pitocin. All the shit I wanted to avoid. But I didn't know what else to do. I still don't understand why I was not dilating after being in what felt like active labor for so long.
The epidural was administered around 4pm. It kind of worked initially but more on one side, and I tried to sleep, but a dozen people interrupted everything and I maybe got 20 minutes. Then it started to wear off and I especially could feel everything on my right side. Impossible to sleep again. They tried a couple different things to get it working again but no luck. At 7pm Anne Marie had to leave to attend another birth. Around 8pm (almost 40 hours of labor and no sleep) I was still 2cm and they started the lowest possible dose of pitocin. The epidural wore off entirely and I was in pain, and stuck in the bed because being a VBAC they required constant fetal monitoring. They administered a 2nd epidural. Again it worked more on one side than the other (opposite side), but it was enough to get some rest. This is when I got my only two hours of sleep (still interrupted by several people) in my 2.5 days of labor. Then the epidural started to wear off again in the early morning. They tried a stronger dose and other things but nothing worked and eventually it wore off entirely. This was early Wednesday morning. The pitocin was working but still slowly; I was 4cm. Contractions were 2min apart and very painful. My doula showed up again sometime that morning. I finally consented to them breaking my waters. The contractions intensified.
Around 9:30am (about 53 hours of labor) I was still 4cm. I was up on all fours feeling so much pressure and pain, moaning and growling through contractions. The nurse just kept obsessing over the fetal monitor not being in place because I was moving around. (His heart rate had been perfect thus far.) I requested a c-section. I simply did not believe I had the energy to do it; I figured it would still be several more hours of dilating and then pushing. I signed the consent form. The doctor checked me at 10am and to everyone's amazement I was 7cm. I had dilated 3cm in 30 minutes. I was hitting transition; I threw up. I agreed to get checked again before the surgery. I decided if I kept progressing that fast and was a 9 or 10 very soon, I would try to push him out. My body was already pushing him down. But at 10:30am I was still at 7cm and I could not fathom continuing for hours more. He was born via repeat c-section at 11am. 9/9 apgars, 9lb, 22in. His head was already in the birth canal and he was so big, the doctor had to extend her initial incision in order to wrestle him out.
Of course it was disappointing to not have a home birth after all of the planning and preparation (and money) that we put into it, but it was even more disappointing not to have a vaginal birth. It has been really difficult for me to deal with emotionally, especially knowing I eventually made it to 7cm... and of course the physical recovery from a c-section sucks too.
First photo with Avery with mom and dad.
First time nursing, about an hour after delivery - he latched right on.
Brothers meeting for the first time.
Other Reflections on the Experience
This birth, despite being a c-section, was still much more positive than my first.
For the following reasons:
* I went into labor on my own, so baby was ready to come out. So incredibly important, seriously.
* I got to labor for over 24 hours at home. I really enjoyed many of these hours even if I was disappointed to transfer at the end of them. I enjoyed being with Sean, in my own home; I enjoyed the birth tub.
* Once at the hospital I was honestly impressed with the staff. 9 of 10 people we interacted with ranged from nice/good to amazing/above and beyond. Such a difference from the last hospital, and also a relief because I was worried about being treated poorly as a homebirth transfer. The first nurse I was assigned in L&D was actually a certified doula as well - the only RN in AZ who is also a doula. Cool. There were exceptions, a couple dumb doctors/residents and a cranky tech, but overall everyone was wonderful.
* They all read my birth plan - each shift - and discussed it with me, asked questions, let me know about forms we would need to sign for things we were declining, all in a respectful manner.
* Once it was time to augment labor with pitocin, they followed my wishes (and best practice for a VBAC) on doing so very slowly. They upped the dose more slowly than usual and by the time I had the baby it had only gone up to a 10 when they regular use levels around 20. This was best both for the baby and for my scarred uterus.
* Although they offered to break my bag of waters several times throughout the process, they didn't pressure or hassle me when I said no. I only consented after I had gotten to 4cm and been in labor for 48 hours; before then I had not wanted to be on "the clock" plus I was being cautious because I was GBS +. (But by 48 hours I knew I was kidding myself and I was already on a clock, I couldn't do this for two more days. :P)
* The resident assigned to me was very encouraging about the VBAC. I think she was disappointed when I asked for a RCS. :P She wanted to see me accomplish my goal. This was nice given I was just assigned a random doctor.
* I got to hold my baby and nurse him in just under an hour after surgery. He latched right on. (I didn't get to hold Ari for five hours.) I feel like bonding has happened immediately with Avery whereas it took awhile with Ari. I am so grateful for this.
Overall, a much better, much less traumatic experience in many ways. This is what I am trying to focus on... that I did the best I could to achieve my goal and even though I didn't get a home birth or a vaginal birth, this surgical birth experience was still worlds better than my first. It is hard not to feel "broken" after two surgical births though and we definitely won't be having any more kids. But in the end I am ok and I got two healthy boys from these experiences.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)